Sleep? We don't need no stinking sleep!

Aaaaand... here I am. Again.

Lesson #2 of being a director. Sleep becomes an anomaly in your life. My bedtime is 10:00... PM... I know, I know. Way too early for someone so young and vivacious... ;)

But it seems that, in these past 2 weeks, it doesn't matter WHEN you go to bed.... it doesn't matter how many glasses of wine you have consumed... it doesn't matter if the temperature's right, the pillows are fluffed, the shallow buzz of the fan is on... IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER. No matter how hard you try, no matter how many NyQuil you take... it does not happen. The pullstring on the mind lightbulb is broken, and try as you may.... you will NOT fall asleep.

I now have to keep a pen and paper on my bedside table. Too many nights I have sat up and scrambled for my housecoat because I have come up with a brilliant solution to a blocking/splatterzone/whatever problem.
My reflexes are so good, that the synchronicity of which I turn on the light and reach for my pen is rivaled by olympic swimmers and pairs skaters alike. Eat your hearts out Brasseur and Eisler... if it were the "World Idea-Writing At 3:14am Championships", you'd settle for silver, bitches. It would also be the early 90's and I'd be sporting hammer pants and snap bracelets whilst playing Pogs, but I digress....

The whole purpose for me leaving Zombieoke was to go to bed early, as to get my rest for my upcoming trip to Calgary to attend Theatre Calgary's matinee performace of "The Drowsy Chaperone". (Zombieoke: -noun {zom-bee-oh-kee}. Def: Evil Dead cast gored themselves up to go sing karaoke and consume mass quantities of fermented grain... all things I am a huge fan of).
Although it pained me to leave, I did so, to sleep. But no. Instead, I am lured out of bed, in the hopes that blahging about my current woe will cause me to fall into a much needed coma. Well, it's 12:23am, a long weekend, I have a 3 hour drive to make at 9:00am.... Tim Hortons, let your Gods shine upon me and replace my blood with your caffeinated goodness tomorrow.

Of course, there is a duel purpose for this trip. One: The Drowsy Chaperone. Two: 2 Gallons of Liquid Latex for the masks in the show. For all of you who don't know the complexities of liquid latex and it's PMS, let me explain. The reason that I have to drive 267km from home to acquire said liquid latex, is that there is nowhere that will ship it in the cold winters of Canada. Because if liquid latex freezes, that's it. Lights out. Ring the bell, watch the dollar bills freeze into an oblivion of icy Hell. And, if my nifty Weather Network app on my iPhone is accurate, it is currently -23 degrees, both in Calgary AND in Medicine Hat. (BTW, the current weather conditions in Calgary read as "Ice Crystals".... WTF does that mean? A whole lot of Mother Nature and her bad attitude, that's what that is.).
Therefore, I have a stock of self-heating foot warmers, a cooler, and towels for the ride home. Pre-planning, my friends. I am not letting $200 worth of liquid latex do anything but travel safely and enjoy the Stomp-inspired concert that will be going on in the van-ride home.

So, I shall attempt, yet again, to let sleep come to me and embrace me in her warm, restful arms. "OOOOOH!! WHAT IF WE........ "

Gold medal.